Proud To Be A.....(insert weird mascot name here)

I wonder about things a lot. Usually it's stuff that has no real-world value, but...well, it's out there so somebody oughta think about it from time to time. Might as well be me.

Last night I was thinking about mascots. Where did the concept of a mascot come from? I read one place that they have found cave drawings that suggest the mascot dates back to the caveman days. OK, so Ugg and Grogg didn't have fire, wheels or weapons, but Willy the Woolly Mammoth was the epitome of team spirit at the local rockball game. ???? I'm a bit skeptical...

Anyway, last night they were talking about one of the guys from church is now playing on a semi-pro football team called the Mansfield Marauders. Of course the big question was, what is a Marauder? Well, if you'd like to know...it's a pirate. Which in this day and age is not really a cool thing to be since the US Navy has been shooting them out of the water lately, but "Mansfield Marauder" does have a certain ring of terror to it, I suppose. And isn't that the whole point of a mascot, to strike fear deep into the heart of your opponent?...

I'm used to questions about strange mascot names. We here in Shelby are proud Whippets. What I didn't realize is that most of the outside world has no idea what a Whippet is. How sad. A Whippet is a sleek racing dog, similar to a Greyhound. Ah yes, everyone knows what a greyhound is. Of course, had it not been for the buses, they would have been clueless about them too. We used to have a wonderful Whippet mascot outfit that our school started using when I was a Senior. One of my best friends proudly got to name him...Victor E Hound. Then somehow someone lost the head (??? How in the world...) so they replaced it with a slightly deranged looking Whippet head. But deranged or not, we still hold it proud....

When Adam graduated, he left Whippetville for the land of Zippy, the Kangaroo. (Which prompted mom to make a clever little "From a Whip to a Zip" sign as displayed in photo above.) Who would have ever thought of a Kangaroo for a mascot?? But, as all kangaroo lovers know, they are animals "fast, agile & powerful with an undying determination." So today we also proudly "Fear The Roo", as Zippy compels us to do.

Of course us Ohio folk are well known as Buckeyes. I suppose it does look a bit strange. A giant nut-head with a body under it running around a stadium while the crowd goes wild. I'll admit, I can't really explain how a nut fosters a sense of pride and dignity. Some things you just have to take on faith. Trust me....

As crazy as Brutus Buckeye may seem to some, there are other schools who are even less fortunate in the mascot arena. I mean, would you like to be a University of California-Santa Cruz Banana Slug? BANANA SLUG. I'm thinkin' someone had been inhaling a bit too much of that funny weed they grow out that way to have even considered that one. Or how about the Scottsdale Fighting Artichokes? Or the North Carolina School of Arts Fighting Pickles? A fighting pickle. Even for Art school kids...that's bad.

So, I guess the moral of the story is that no matter how insane or bizarre they may seem to everyone else, every mascot has it's own faithful following. I know I stand tall and proclaim that I'm proud to be a Whippet...a Buckeye...a Zip. And I'm sure out there somewhere is someone who does the same when they shout "Yes, I'm a Freeport Fighting Pretzel!!"

Lord have mercy on them...