My Mom has many talents. Sewing, cooking, crafting, general insanity. However, there are some things that give her trouble. Electronics can sometimes be one of them. Tonight was a classic example. She was trying to download a picture of the big purple dress she recently worked on. So she calls me 'cause it's not working. I try to help. The conversation goes roughly something like this:
Me: "OK mom, find the USB cable that fits that camera and hook it into the computer. It should start up automatically for you then."
Mom: "What's an SUV cable?"
Me: "No, not SUV...USB"
Mom: "OK. What's it look like"
Me: "It's probably black. One end fits into the computer...like the one that you use for your Zune..."
Mom: "Oh, it has those ends?"
Me: ??? "Yeah...I guess..."
Mom: "You mean the one like goes into the end of the white one with the prong things?"
Me: "I have no idea what you're talking about"
Mom: "You know, the Zune"
Me: (dear lord) "Mom, what do you charge your Zune with? Do you know that cord that you use?"
Mom: "Yeah, with the white prong thing!"
Me: (finally getting that she's talking about an AC adaptor that the USB cord hooks into) "Yes - that's the one. There's a cord like that for your camera too. You have to find that one."
Mom: "Can I use the one for the Zune?"
Me: "No...it won't fit"
Mom: "Are you sure?"
Me: "Yes, mom...I'm sure. One of the ends is too big. You have to find the one for the camera."
Mom: "OK. Where is it?"
Me: "Well, I really don't know. Is it with the bag?"
Mom: "The bag"
Me: "Yeah...the bag you carry the camera in"
Mom: "I'll look" (sounds of shuffling and drawers opening and shutting) "No...it's not here. OH, here's a tape I can listen to that came with it. I have to see this. Wait...here's the box." (More sounds of shuffling) "I can't get the box open. Who made this box?? Why did they put it together like this?? Oh, there, it's open. What is this white plastic thing? I don't see a cord. Would it be under...what is this for? Oh, don't need that. OK...no, it's not in the box."
Me: "OK, well, I don't know where it is then..."
Mom: "Are you sure the Zune won't work?"
Me: "Yes mom, I'm sure"
Mom: "I see a circle on the camera. Is that where it goes?"
Me: "I don't think so. USB sockets are not usually circles. There should be another spot."
Mom: "I don't see it."
Me: "You probably have to pull open a little rubber or plastic cover to find it."
Mom: "There is no rubber cover. Oh...is...oh...Wait, here's a hole. Does it have those teeth things down on it?"
Me: ".........what????........"
Mom: "Those things like teeth...you know."
Me: "I.....I really don't know Mom"
Mom: "OK, well, I'll just have to wait until you come over then."
Me: "OK...we'll take care of it then."
Yep, just a typical conversation on a typical night.
I'm not worried though, because I know I'll be able to get the photo loaded for her.
Especially since I just found her "SUV" cord in a group of stuff that I brought over here to my apartment.
Go figure.
Showing posts with label TV. Show all posts
Showing posts with label TV. Show all posts
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
A Toast To Ingenuity...
I was thinking about great inventions the other day. I don't know why. Oh wait - yes I do...it was because of Mom. She had to go to the store and buy some white-out. Which reminded me of Peter Nesmith's mom. She's the one that invented white-out. Which, then reminded me of the Monkees. You know, that fake singing group from the 60's that somehow got their own TV show. Peter was the one in that group that always wore a toboggan. Which, I must say, I never understood. What was the point? Kind of like the guy in the Mamas and the Papas that always wore that funky fur hat. Musicians can be really weird sometimes. Anyway...then when I thought of the Monkees I started singing "Cheer Up Sleepy Jean" or whatever the name of that song was in my head and nearly went insane the remainder of the day.
I hate when that happens.
But...I digress. Back to inventions. Do you ever stop to consider some of the really cool inventions we have? I mean, think about white-out. It's really awesome stuff. Well, unless you get too much on your page and it gets all clumpy on you. Then you try to wipe it off with your finger and just end up smearing it all over the place, except for that one glob that becomes a craggly little white-out mountain in the middle of your letter and is impossible to write on, but you try anyway and then the tip of your pen get all clogged up and won't write anything else at all after that. All the while you're trying to get the stuff that dried on your finger off but deep down you know that the only way you'll ever get it off your skin is to use a power washer, so you just resign yourself to the fact that you'll never get to finish your smeared up, clumpy letter with your clogged pen...and you'll no doubt die with white-out stained fingers.
Maybe that's bad example to use.
Let's take the remote control instead. Think about it...who in the world was sitting on their couch one day and just decided..."I would like a little box that I can just point at my TV and make the channels change with the press of a button!" All I can venture is...it had to be a couch-potato American. (Probably one of the ones from my last blog who is contributing to the "obesity epidemic" in America.) But just imagine life now without the remote control.
***Shudder***
To prove my point...Have you ever lost your remote? What do you do? Don't lie..I know...you spend 45 minutes tearing everything in the house apart trying to find it, all the while fussing and fuming because you're about to miss the show you really wanted to see while you continue to watch some show about the mating habits of the North American Turtle like a tortured prisoner who can't escape his cell, don't you? Of course in about 3.7 seconds you could have just walked over to the TV and changed the channel manually...but that is not the point! Life is disrupted! We have to find the remote!!! How will we survive without it??!! And then just when you've reached you're final breaking point -- There it is!! Wedged like a piece of pie in the cushion of the couch...or tidily laying in the trash can, just under the used coffee grounds where your child so kindly placed it for you....or on the back of the toilet because you carried into the bathroom when you had to go.........eh, let's not go there. Ahh...all is right with the world again.
So anyway - my point is - never take a great idea for granted. It may just revolutionize YOUR world someday!
(You'll have to forgive me tonight. I didn't get home from work until 9:00, and my mind is about gone. Plus, I just discovered I have white-out all over my finger. So, now I'm going to lay down and try and get some rest. Just as soon as I find the remote to turn off the blasted TV...)
I hate when that happens.
But...I digress. Back to inventions. Do you ever stop to consider some of the really cool inventions we have? I mean, think about white-out. It's really awesome stuff. Well, unless you get too much on your page and it gets all clumpy on you. Then you try to wipe it off with your finger and just end up smearing it all over the place, except for that one glob that becomes a craggly little white-out mountain in the middle of your letter and is impossible to write on, but you try anyway and then the tip of your pen get all clogged up and won't write anything else at all after that. All the while you're trying to get the stuff that dried on your finger off but deep down you know that the only way you'll ever get it off your skin is to use a power washer, so you just resign yourself to the fact that you'll never get to finish your smeared up, clumpy letter with your clogged pen...and you'll no doubt die with white-out stained fingers.
Maybe that's bad example to use.
Let's take the remote control instead. Think about it...who in the world was sitting on their couch one day and just decided..."I would like a little box that I can just point at my TV and make the channels change with the press of a button!" All I can venture is...it had to be a couch-potato American. (Probably one of the ones from my last blog who is contributing to the "obesity epidemic" in America.) But just imagine life now without the remote control.
***Shudder***
To prove my point...Have you ever lost your remote? What do you do? Don't lie..I know...you spend 45 minutes tearing everything in the house apart trying to find it, all the while fussing and fuming because you're about to miss the show you really wanted to see while you continue to watch some show about the mating habits of the North American Turtle like a tortured prisoner who can't escape his cell, don't you? Of course in about 3.7 seconds you could have just walked over to the TV and changed the channel manually...but that is not the point! Life is disrupted! We have to find the remote!!! How will we survive without it??!! And then just when you've reached you're final breaking point -- There it is!! Wedged like a piece of pie in the cushion of the couch...or tidily laying in the trash can, just under the used coffee grounds where your child so kindly placed it for you....or on the back of the toilet because you carried into the bathroom when you had to go.........eh, let's not go there. Ahh...all is right with the world again.
So anyway - my point is - never take a great idea for granted. It may just revolutionize YOUR world someday!
(You'll have to forgive me tonight. I didn't get home from work until 9:00, and my mind is about gone. Plus, I just discovered I have white-out all over my finger. So, now I'm going to lay down and try and get some rest. Just as soon as I find the remote to turn off the blasted TV...)
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Machine Mutiny
Ssshhhh...I'm typing this blog very quietly so as not to alert the other appliances in my house to its content...
My electronics have gone on what appears to be an organized mutiny lately. Honestly, how on earth do they know when one of them decides to die? It is actually amazing when you think about it. It started with the microwave and the machine-gun sounds it started making every time I turned it on. So, in fear of being pelted by stray gamma waves and have my insides secretly cooked in my sleep, I broke down and replaced it.
In the meantime, I finally discovered the source of my telephone/Internet problems...which had been an ongoing saga for nearly a year. If I were on the Internet and the phone would ring, the Internet would disconnect. I would just like to say that you cannot imagine how annoying that actually is. I called my wonderful Internet provider on numerous occasions to determine the root cause of this. I finally decided that spending 12 hours of my life talking to idiots was not a worthwhile venture...so I gave up.
Twas about that time that my television started its slow death march. Taking at least 10 - 15 minutes for the picture to arrive when turned on, it had turned into the world's biggest, ugliest radio. Again...extremely annoying. Then it just died. I held a lovely memorial service and then stole a TV from mom's as a temporary replacement. Unfortunately, it was dead too. Ahh...perhaps we have a cable problem. So contact the wonderful cable provider (yes, the same nuts as above) to rewire my apt. While I'm watching the dude work, I casually mention my phone problem. He picks it up and says, "Oh...it's a 2.4 GHz. It's on the same frequency as your Internet...that's why it keeps cutting out." Are you kidding me??!! I didn't know whether to kick him or hug him. (You'll be happy to know I refrained from both.)
So, I purchase a new phone. This was a fiasco in itself...probably worthy of it's own special blog. (So I will spare you that tonight.) So back to the TV...the cable rewiring complete...and it is still in need of life support. I have no choice but to take drastic action....and so tonight I sit and watch a brand new flat screen TV, while the 387-pound-12-year-old-tube TV and the slightly-smaller- but-almost-as-heavy-stolen television sit contentedly on the floor beside it. I am broke, but satisfied.
Now I live in fear...what is next?? The alarm clock...the curling iron....the keyboard??? (I do not fear for the refrigerator or stove as they are not owned by me, therefore will live forever I am sure.) OH - I now see. The stereo, which has started performing a lovely trick of increasing its volume to near deafening levels regardless of which way you turn the dial. The mutiny continues...
My electronics have gone on what appears to be an organized mutiny lately. Honestly, how on earth do they know when one of them decides to die? It is actually amazing when you think about it. It started with the microwave and the machine-gun sounds it started making every time I turned it on. So, in fear of being pelted by stray gamma waves and have my insides secretly cooked in my sleep, I broke down and replaced it.
In the meantime, I finally discovered the source of my telephone/Internet problems...which had been an ongoing saga for nearly a year. If I were on the Internet and the phone would ring, the Internet would disconnect. I would just like to say that you cannot imagine how annoying that actually is. I called my wonderful Internet provider on numerous occasions to determine the root cause of this. I finally decided that spending 12 hours of my life talking to idiots was not a worthwhile venture...so I gave up.
Twas about that time that my television started its slow death march. Taking at least 10 - 15 minutes for the picture to arrive when turned on, it had turned into the world's biggest, ugliest radio. Again...extremely annoying. Then it just died. I held a lovely memorial service and then stole a TV from mom's as a temporary replacement. Unfortunately, it was dead too. Ahh...perhaps we have a cable problem. So contact the wonderful cable provider (yes, the same nuts as above) to rewire my apt. While I'm watching the dude work, I casually mention my phone problem. He picks it up and says, "Oh...it's a 2.4 GHz. It's on the same frequency as your Internet...that's why it keeps cutting out." Are you kidding me??!! I didn't know whether to kick him or hug him. (You'll be happy to know I refrained from both.)
So, I purchase a new phone. This was a fiasco in itself...probably worthy of it's own special blog. (So I will spare you that tonight.) So back to the TV...the cable rewiring complete...and it is still in need of life support. I have no choice but to take drastic action....and so tonight I sit and watch a brand new flat screen TV, while the 387-pound-12-year-old-tube TV and the slightly-smaller- but-almost-as-heavy-stolen television sit contentedly on the floor beside it. I am broke, but satisfied.
Now I live in fear...what is next?? The alarm clock...the curling iron....the keyboard??? (I do not fear for the refrigerator or stove as they are not owned by me, therefore will live forever I am sure.) OH - I now see. The stereo, which has started performing a lovely trick of increasing its volume to near deafening levels regardless of which way you turn the dial. The mutiny continues...
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